Love Cruising ? Love Cruising With Royal Caribbean?
Follow the misadventures of our hero aboard Royal Caribbean. He is real and bears no resemblance to the the perfect men in Royal Caribbean adverts with their perfect hair and teeth. He is borderline obese, balding and ever so slightly incontinent.
Marvel at his stupidity. Gasp as he comes close to cardiac arrest on the Sport Court on Deck 13. Cheer as he narrowly survives being stung to death by Portuguese Man O’War. Be astounded as he reveals the secret to winning the Daily Trivia Quiz. Despair as he mercilessly “gratuity-shamed” by Guest Relations on Deck 5.
Discover the good, the bad and the ugly aboard Royal Caribbean as your intrepid guide searches for the answer to his quest…
“What is the magic of cruising?”
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There’s nothing more Neil Jones likes than a vacation on a cruise ship. Every year he scrapes together enough money to sail somewhere in the World with his family – usually on Royal Caribbean.
He’s not like the perfect people you see in Royal Caribbean adverts – his teeth aren’t straight, his clothes don’t fit and most of his hair is disappearing over the top of his head.
Fate is a cruel mistress to Neil. If something can go wrong it normally does and this enhances his feeling of inadequacy and paranoia.
Ever the optimist though, Neil manages to overcome all the trials and tribulations thrown at him onboard a ship and is back for more of the same next year.
That is unless someone reads “Adventures With My Sea Pass Card” at Royal Caribbean and he is excommunicated.
Having spent most of his life as a drone in several large corporate roles Neil quit the rat race on turning 50 and followed his dream to produce, direct and write movies, videos and TV shows.
Not the smartest of options from the position of financial security but he has no regrets about this course of action (except maybe for the company pension contributions, luxury car, executive bonuses and five weeks paid holiday).
One feature film, two television series and numerous commercials later, he is embarking on a series of travel books. The forthcoming books are not your typical fare – he’s no multilingual globetrotting expert – he’s just an idiot armed with a passport.
Growing up in the early 1960s, Neil became fascinated with tv series like “The Prisoner”, “Danger Man”, “The Champions”, “Randall and Hopkirk (Deceased)” and has a worryingly encyclopaedic knowledge of these series. He is also a walking depository of every useless James Bond fact in the universe.
Neil lives in a large hard-to-maintain 17th Century house North of London with his long-suffering wife.
He is officially thirteen years into his mid-life crisis.