What if you were afraid to even turn the doorknob to your front door when coming home because of what might wait inside? What would it take to make you step out of your shadows, to once and for all break free from the twisted security of familiarity, and take a chance, a little risk, that could change everything?
What if you could ask for what you want without being afraid? Could you trust another person that much? Could you trust yourself to ask it and be willing to hear the things you fear?
And what if you could truly begin to conquer those deep fears that hide inside you, allow your heart to open, become vulnerable and have the chance for real intimacy—the kind that allows another to come closer than you’ve ever let anyone before? What if you dared to be loved and because you did, you transitioned into joy?
My name is Nicky Young. This is my family saga and a love story that tells about the horrible, beautiful, twisted, amazing vulnerability of family dysfunction and how I overcame fears of abandonment and deep intimacy. Relationships were things to be held at a distance. When I learned to open my heart and trust another—and myself—I was able to really, really, be alive.
This story is about daring to love and transitioning into joy.
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PAMELA TAEUFFER, BIOGRAPHY
AWARENESS – DEFINING MOMENTS
While working nights, our mother trusted our father to care for my sister and me. I had only asked him for help. He sat in our living room with a friend, drinking. I was four when my father smacked me hard enough to leave his handprint on my body. It was then I knew our lives were changing.
My son had just turned nineteen when he suffered a Traumatic Brain Injury.
I learned about cancer when my sister screamed, “I’m dying.”
My father had been dead for twenty years, when Mom told me he’d just dropped her off. I began to understand dementia.
LESSONS – TWISTED GIFTS
I write about life’s traumas and tell them through fictional family sagas. Through the characters and their flaws, I show their love stories and they way they learn to participate again, learn to trust, let go of fear, and embrace the twisted gifts within their dysfunction. I show how they risk everything when they’re vulnerable and dare to be loved. It’s when they begin trusting themselves, they transition into joy.
BY DAY – I HAVE TO MAKE MONEY SO I CAN CREATE
The small, vacation rental/ property management company I run with my husband and son in Sonoma County, California is a big part of my creative life as well. I craft stories about staying in wine country and listen to the stories of both guests and tenants, imagining their tales as a good book someday. I love that I was born and raised in San Francisco, and was introduced early in my life to baseball. I’ve rung a cable car bell, and went to concerts in Golden Gate Park where Jimmy Hendrix and Santana played.
WHAT I’VE DONE/AM DOING – IT’S DEFINTELY A JOURNEY OF DREAMS!
Broken Bottles is a sixteen novel series. Shadow Heart and Fire Heart and the recently released Jagged Heart and Amazing Heart, wrap up Part I. I’m honored to have 3 poems in an anthology called The Beats Go On, and a story in Sisters Born, Sisters Found. I am working on a series called My Two Years as a Porn Star, and have released the first book in a series about being an introvert, “The Introverts Guide for Attending Conferences and Business Networking.”